When Churches Market Like Airlines

December 18, 2008 by

For a bit of fun to help you through your week, check out Monday Morning Insight’s discussion of what the church would look like if it were run like an airline. Really, it’s just a look at what would be some fees the church could charge. Maybe this is a good way for you to weather the economic downturn? (Kidding, do not take that suggestion.)

  • All aisle seats are now $10/week. Back row premium seating available for $20 per week
  • Cell phone ringing during service: $50 one time charge
  • Hit job on the organist (rates vary per city/church)
  • Read the full list…

I would go beyond just the fees:

  • You would arrive on a Sunday only to find out the service didn’t begin until Monday, and if you didn’t stick around, you would lose five hundred bucks.
  • When you arrived, the greeters would be intensely angry and have already worked 14 hours for slim wages.
  • As you entered the bulletin-pickup area, there would be a very, very strangely long waiting time between the bulletins getting to church and arriving in your hands.
  • Communion would only be served in long services, and getting wine instead of grape juice would be five dollars.

When you look at airline business strategy, I guess church marketing doesn’t seem so bad.

Post By:

Joshua Cody

Josh Cody served as our associate editor for several years before moving on to bigger things. Like Texas. These days he lives in Austin, Texas, with his wife, and you can find him online or on Twitter when he's not wrestling code.
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One Response to “When Churches Market Like Airlines”

  • David Jones
    December 18, 2008

    This is the way my life often goes . . . chaos and confusion introduce another day when I’ll go out and strive to fulfill God’s calling on my life. But chaos is often part of our circumstances in this world. Fortunately, we are in the world, but not of the world. My friend and ministry client, Pastor Lynton Turkington, says, “It’s not about a religion, it’s about relationships.” I think he means a relationship with Jesus Christ, but he also means a relationship with our family, friends, and neighbors. If we could banish chaos and distress we wouldn’t need relationships; but God strictly intends for us to live out the Gospel through relationships.
    And that’s why when we talk about “marketing ministries” we aren’t just talking about diligent planning, anticipating hazards, and ironing out all the wrinkles. Planning is vital, of course, but it’s all for naught if relationships aren’t the goal of the ministry and the power behind the success of marketing. Building relationships to fulfill the Great Commission in the midst of our chaotic day should always be the ministry’s goal (Mathew 28:19 ).

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